Beating Eggs into Submission Christian Grey Style in The Red Room of Pain. Pain Meaning the French Word for Bread, Obviously.

Well, things have been hectic lately and while I have been posting to the Facebook page, I hate that I don't have computer access to post on the blog more often. I start my new job on Monday so fingers crossed that this will be taken care of soon.

On another note, I've been reading more. Since I'm all about literacy and grammar, I figured I should get back into doing that. This week I put aside a Mitch Albom book to delve into the world of Mommy porn. Yes, that's right- I'm reading "Fifty Shades of Grey." This book mostly makes me sad. It has nothing to do with the material and a lot to do with the fact that women think this is cutting edge. Maybe my generation is just over sexed or I'm some sort of harlot, but I thought everyone was familiar with this kind of stuff. Ha! Vanillas. This book is a lot less BDSM and a lot more internet geek that watched way too much "Secretary." All in all, if you found this book and it's sex scenes to be shocking, never read a Brett Easton Ellis book. You will die of a heart attack. In "American Psycho" for instance there are sex scenes involving severed heads, starving rats and pieces of cheese. It's nothing for the faint of heart, that's for sure.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm actually enjoying "50 Shades," but for the plot, not for the horribly written sex scenes. I did, however, laugh and have to read aloud the part where Christian licks her belly button and "elongates" her nipples. Elongates? Like silly putty? Like he's going to start swinging them around while a midget comes out from under the bed and double dutches with him? Awkward.

Speaking of midgets- Asians are usually very short. Yeah, that really doesn't fit into what I'm talking about, but I'm really not sure how to segue from talking about the book to talking about the amazingly delicious Wonton Cupcakes that I made. Yes, I'm still obsessed with turning things into cupcakes. It's a delicious obsession really. This recipe takes a wonton and tops it with sour cream and teriyaki sauce.

Wonton Cupcakes                        makes about a dozen 1/2

                  

• 16 oz pack of Nasoya Egg Roll Wrappers
• 16 oz bag of coleslaw mix
• 2 lbs ground pork or chicken
• 1 large onion, diced
• 2 tsp ground ginger
• 1 tsp black pepper
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1/4 c Oyster Sauce
• 1/4 c Soy Sauce

Preheat oven to 375*F
Brown chicken or pork in a large skillet with onion, pepper and ginger.

Remove from heat and transfer to a large bowl.

Add in package of coleslaw mix.

Stir in sugar, soy sauce and oyster sauce.
Place one sheet of  wonton in each compartment of a non stick or greased muffin tin.
Put about a TBS of filling on top of wonton and cover it with another sheet, being sure to tuck the sheet in.
Bake for about 20 minutes or until golden brown and hardened.
Top with a dollop of "frosting," green onions and serve with fried rice.

Wonton Cupcake Frosting 

• 1 C sour cream
• 2 tsp teriyaki sauce 
• 1 tsp soy sauce  

 Mix together and serve dollop on top of each wonton cupcake.

Why I've been MIA and the Cupcake Recipe You'll Want as a Main Dish

My lovelies, I  have missed talking to you. I was supposed to get my computer back last week, but problems came up and I honestly don't know when I'll be back online. Instead I'm having to go to my grandparents house and use their internet connection. This is backwards. Shouldn't my grandparents be coming to me for their technology problems and not the other way around? 

A lot has happened since we last spoke. For instance I've started baking. I've never really been much of a baker. This isn't because I can't bake, I just don't like being precise with my cooking. I hardly ever measure when I'm cooking. I think of cooking as an art and baking as a science. I hate science. I have, however discovered that I'm some sort of odd biscotti queen and I rock at making muffins from scratch. Another thing that happened is that my Facebook profile was banned for three weeks by a woman that found our Unwed Housewife Facebook page to be unfunny. Basically, the woman didn't find sarcasm and irony to be humorous, therefore she got her granny panties in a bunch and reported a picture in the group. Boo to you! Because of her reporting and my lack of an internet connection from which I could make an alternate profile and set it to admin, I was forced to leave the page and blog on a hiatus, but never fear. We're baaaaaaack, and I have a whole arsenal of foodie awesomeness awaiting.

I also have new addiction problem and I need help goal; to turn everything I can into a cupcake. It started off with meatloaf cupcakes which are essentially just meatballs covered in mashed potatoes. That left me wondering, if you can turn meatloaf into cupcakes, what other savory foods can be cupcakerized? I then Googled savory cupcakes and a Pandora's Box of savory cuteness was opened. My latest cupcake venture was a Taco Tuesday Twist on boring tacos. They were a huge hit and adorable at the same time. They were also incredibly simple to make.

Taco Cupcakes    makes 24

2 lbs ground beef

1 can refried beans

2 c Cheddar or Monterrey Jack cheese

12 oz package of Nasoya Wonton Wrappers

two packs of taco seasoning

sour cream, diced tomato, lettuce, green onion and assorted toppings

2- 12 count muffin tins

Preheat oven to 350*F.

Brown beef in a large skillet and follow directions on taco seasoning packet. Set aside

If preferred, heat beans in a separate pan. (Optional)

Place one sheet of wonton in a greased cupcake tin.

Place a dollop of beans on top of wonton followed by about a tbs of beef, a tsp of cheese, another  wonton wrapper, another tbs of beef and top it with another tsp of cheese.

Repeat in that order until both tins are full.

Place tins in oven for 20-30 minutes or until wrappers are crisp.

Top with a dollop of sour cream and your choice of taco toppings.

Serve with Spanish rice and beans,